“People think depression is sadness, crying or dressing in black. But people are wrong. Depression is the constant feeling of being numb. You wake up in the morning just to go back to bed again.
Depression is like a thick fog. It blinds your ability to see. You can’t look forward or go backwards. Your breathing hitches like there’s a lump in your throat. You feel lost but with a known direction. The paths that you follow daily seem new to you. You stand there over-thinking about everything going right and wrong in your life. It seems like nothing is right. Your mind turns into a self-destructive bomb with a clock and as the darkness prevails the sunset the clock starts ticking.With every tick you come up with another way to bring yourself down.
….Tick! I’m worthless.
Tick! Nobody cares about me.
Tick! Why am I alive in the first place?
Tick! I should kill myself.
Tick!! No one will care even if I die…
You hear your demons whisper in your ears telling you how worthless, ugly and how big of a failure you are. You scream back at them to shut them off but it only makes it worse.
The things that used to make you happy have no effect on you anymore. You stop talking to your friends or replying to their texts. You feel alone in a crowded place. That internal isolation starts eating you up and you decide to turn down all the plans to socialize. Depression is the weight that keeps you from moving on. A silence surrounds you but that silence is the loudest sound you’ll ever hear.
You feel haunted.
It’s like a ghost that creeps on you out of nowhere and decides to stay and haunt you for the rest of your life. It comes to your room every night just to haunt you. Your life starts feeling like a black and white movie. Every light that you ignite turns into gray.
You’re afraid they’ll think you’re crazy.
You don’t talk to anyone about this because you know they won’t understand and you’re too afraid to be judged so you keep it to yourself. You’re hopeless and desperate for help but you know you can’t ask for it. You think there’s no hope.
But there is hope.
Fog, no matter how how thick can’t last forever. For some people it’s easier to end their lives rather than asking for help and being judged. Suicide is not the answer it’ll only make it worse for your afterlife.. Hell life and hell death? No.
Get your shit together!
Let the demons and ghosts know who’s the boss.. Giving up will only make you weak and that’s not true. You’re not weak..All you have to do is stay on your feet till this fog disappears. All you have to do is survive and one day things will be better.Depression typically involves sleep problems; whether you’re sleeping too little or too much, your mood suffers. Get on a better sleep schedule. Expose yourself to a little sunlight every day. Lack of sunlight can make depression worse…
Cherish your life..
Even when your light is dim someone out there sees it.
Fight for them but most importantly fight for the your-self who’s living in a shadow of a lonely sad person.