On February 1, 16 we were given the results of my biopsy. My mother seemed quite disturbed. I, on the other hand oblivious of the medical terms being used was quite confident that my mother was over-reacting over some sort of ordinary infection as always. (Mothers I tell you!) Till three days later when it was revealed to me that torrents of torment were about to flood my life alongside chemotherapy and a year off from college.. 

Reflecting back, I was as thankless as a serpent. A rebellious teenager telling my parents I hated them and how my life was pathetic and now? I long for one chance, just one chance that I know I’m not destined to be granted. How for once I want to be my old self again just to make things right but I can’t.. How I desire what every human being takes forgranted.. health.

– While I’m sitting here hairless, smelling like a whole damn hospital, they’re flaunting their Victoria’s Secret merch.

-While all the people my age are staying up till midnight, flirting with their crushes, my internet search history comprises of some dark and twisty things that end up relating to death one way or another.

-As the world goes to sleep promising a better tomorrow, I sleep wondering if there will be one for me or not.

-Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night.. Oh! Not by the vibration of a text but by the affliction caused by myriads of hypothetical wrecking balls set on fire blasting my body.
-While they are complaining how their friends have turned out to be traitors, I can’t even commence to elaborate what it’s like to have your own body betray you in comparison.

-While my family is telling me sleep fights cancer I no longer want to fight cancer. Let it win already!

Next time you cry over someone  who doesn’t notice you or because you can’t afford the latest iPhone remember there’s always someone fighting a tougher battle than you. I have everything in my life from love to wealth. The only thing that I’m deprived of is time and I’d do anything to be anyone but me right now but unfortunately I can’t.

You think life is unfair? Wait till you have cancer. ( I hope you don’t though) *sighs* me and my sense of humor. 

EDITED:

After my previous article Yes, I was raped. I decided to use the first person narration again to make it more effective for the readers but as everyone in the comment section is asking me about my health let me clarify.

This is the story of my maternal aunt who was the same age as me when she went through this. She was diagnosed with leukemia and she lost the battle against cancer on 3rd February that year ( REST IN PEACE).. she left a void inside my chest and I wrote this article using first person narration to make it more affective for the readers and to see myself in her shoes.. Thank you for showing concern it means a lot. ❤

Whereas me? I’m living a healthy life..

Published by Farwa Khan

54 thoughts on “Yes, I have cancer.”

    1. This is the story of my maternal aunt who was the same age as me when she went through this. She was diagnosed with leukemia and she lost the battle against cancer on 3rd February that year.. she left a void inside my chest and I wrote this article using first person narration to make it more affective for the readers and to see myself in her shoes.. Thank you for commenting and showing concern it means a lot. ❤
      Whereas me? I’m living a healthy life..

      Liked by 2 people

      Reply

      1. Well you could have mentioned it below somewhere. You write so well that it’s hard to tell. I got so worried! And that’s really sad! Umm. I am happy to see that you’re okay!

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Actually I write articles like these. I wrote one called “Yes, I was Raped” for awareness purposes.
        My regular readers know this already so I didn’t mention but now I’ve mentioned it at the end for the new readers who’re showing great concern. Thank you so much ❤

        Liked by 1 person

  2. This is such a personal, powerful and meaningful post. Thanks for sharing this and putting things into the proper perspective for those of us who can forget how fragile life is. I wish you well.

    Liked by 1 person

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  4. Try the ketogenic diet. One of my WP followers is an oncologist. She goes by WP name—Ketooncologist. She does research on cancer patients taking the ketogenic diet to fight cancer. My prayers are to you. At least youre now aware and fighting this thing through. Better than being oblivious about it before its too late.

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    1. This is the story of my maternal aunt who was the same age as me when she went through this. She was diagnosed with leukemia and she lost the battle against cancer on 3rd February that year.. she left a void inside my chest and I wrote this article using first person narration to make it more affective for the readers and to see myself in her shoes.. Thank you for commenting and showing concern it means a lot. ❤
      Whereas me? I’m living a healthy life..

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

      1. Oh! Thank God, you are healthy. Powerful writing! Anyhow, pls. pass on this ketogenic diet info to anyone you know who is afflicted with cancer. It may or may not help them but at this point, I feel that they have nothing to lose. Its always good to take a chance.

        Liked by 1 person

  5. Sorry I hit the ‘like’ icon. How can one like when someone is pouring her heart out with shocking revelation about having to face the deadly cancer. Brave you sound in sharing that with your readers. You must be undergoing all the possible medical treatment, with the hope of conquering the malaise. I add my prayers to those of your family and friends for your speedy recovery and getting back to a normal you. Hoping to have many more of your brave posts. Get well soon!

    Liked by 1 person

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    1. This is the story of my maternal aunt who was the same age as me when she went through this. She was diagnosed with leukemia and she lost the battle against cancer on 3rd February that year.. she left a void inside my chest and I wrote this article using first person narration to make it more affective for the readers and to see myself in her shoes.. Thank you for commenting and showing concern it means a lot. ❤
      Whereas me? I’m living a healthy life..

      Like

      Reply

      1. Thank god you’re living a healthy life. Sorry for the mistaken identity assuming it to be your own story. And very sorry to hear about your maternal aunt’s sad plight at the hand of Leukemia. May she rest in peace wherever she is!

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Amen.. and I’m sorry I should’ve mentioned it at the end. Actually I write such types of pieces like previously I wrote “Yes, I was Raped” about an acquaintance’s sexual abuse experience in first person narration for awareness so my readers already know that I write other people’s tragedic experiences at times but as for new readers they showed such concern that I just edited the article and clarified the misconception. Thank you anyway for showing concern.

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  6. I cannot comprehend, how could I? My own mother is hairless, the side effects of her own chemotherapy and I watch as it takes a toll on her strength, both physically and emotionally. I know inside she is crying about this cruel fate that has befallen her, but yet she does not show it in front of others. You shared your heart in this piece Farwa, and though I cannot comprehend, I can relate. Love and blessings to you.

    Liked by 4 people

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  7. I hope this is a fiction . Well, eventually every soul shall taste death, since life is but a test.. Final recompense still awaits, I hope you for the best.. May Allah bless you with success here and in hereafter.

    Liked by 1 person

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    1. It is fiction..This is the story of my maternal aunt who was the same age as me when she went through this. She was diagnosed with leukemia and she lost the battle against cancer on 3rd February that year.. she left a void inside my chest and I wrote this article using first person narration to make it more affective for the readers and to see myself in her shoes.. Thank you for commenting and showing concern it means a lot. ❤
      Whereas me? I’m living a healthy life..

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

  8. My heart aches for you and your family. I can’t even begin to imagine what you are going through. I’d probably feel like giving up too, but I hope you keep fighting. I hope you kick cancer’s butt.

    Liked by 1 person

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    1. This is the story of my maternal aunt who was the same age as me when she went through this. She was diagnosed with leukemia and she lost the battle against cancer on 3rd February that year.. she left a void inside my chest and I wrote this article using first person narration to make it more affective for the readers and to see myself in her shoes.. Thank you for commenting and showing concern it means a lot. ❤
      Whereas me? I’m living a healthy life..

      Liked by 2 people

      Reply

  13. WOW, Just wow.
    This is very powerful!
    I lost my two older sisters to cancer 2 years ago, within 3 months of each other. One was to leukemia as well.
    You certainly have a way with words.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  14. That is so bad of you….how can you write the entire episode….in first person ….without any note…..here the bloggers relate to everything….and breathe together too….it brings pain….though there were many take aways from your post….I didn’t really intend to like this one….or the other ….though it may not matter….

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    1. I’m sorry.. well my old readers kmow that I write in first person to add weight to my work and make it more relatable. I have written such posts previously and I’m sorry that I didn’t give a heads up to the new ones but I have written it in the end.

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      2. Well I don’t see anyone complaining. Everybody knows that first person narration is a way of writing. I think everyone here os mature enough to know that WordPress isn’t only for sharing experiences , it’s also for sharing stories that are fictional.
        I see no one else complaining because of course people have their way of writing as in Fault in our stars John Green narrated as Hazel Grace that doesn’t mean he’s a girl with cancer or that he’s lying.
        .
        I haven’t experienced negativity or such complaints of WordPress so if you want to spread such aura you can leave my blog.

        Liked by 1 person

  15. Thanks God you’re leading a healthy life 😊 it’s very thoughtful of you to write about the killer disease Cancer and to bring awareness about the trauma of those who are the victims of the Cancer. Nowadays Cancer patients live a relatively normal life after treatment. They survive. I for one. Diagnosed and treated for breast cancer in 2004, I am healthy and kicking with life and utmost energy.

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